A New Heart
In the book Little Women by Louisa May Alcott, the girl Jo struggles to control her temper. Her younger sister Amy burned a book that Jo was writing, and Jo became livid. Because of this, she intentionally didn’t warn Amy about some very thin ice when they went ice skating, and it almost led to Amy being drowned. Jo lamented with her mother Marmee afterwards, “It’s my dreadful temper! I try to cure it, I think I have, and then it breaks out worse than ever. Oh, Mother, what shall I do? What shall I do?... ” Her wise mother responded, “Watch and pray, dear, never get tired of trying, and never think it is impossible to conquer your fault.” To this Jo replied, “You don’t know, you can’t guess how bad it is! It seems as if I could do anything when I’m in a passion. I get so savage, I could hurt anyone and enjoy it. I’m afraid I shall do something dreadful some day, and spoil my life, and make everybody hate me. Oh, Mother, help me, do help me!” Her mother promised that she would: “I will, my child, I will. Don’t cry so bitterly, but remember this day, and resolve with all your soul that you will never know another like it. Jo, dear, we all have our temptations, some far greater than yours, and it often takes us all our lives to conquer them.” She then surprised her daughter but telling her that she too had struggled with her own temper for a very long time: “I’ve been trying to cure it for forty years, and have only succeeded in controlling it. I am angry nearly every day of my life, Jo, but I have learned not to show it, and I still hope to learn not to feel it, though it may take me another forty years to do so.” Indeed, we should strive not just to not show anger but also to not feel anger towards others. The Savior put it this way: “Ye have heard that it hath been said by them of old time, and it is also written before you, that thou shalt not kill, and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment of God; But I say unto you, that whosoever is angry with his brother shall be in danger of his judgment” (3 Nephi 12:21-22). In other words not acting on our anger is not enough; we should also seek to not be angry at all. But, as Marmee learned, that may take a long time, and controlling our actions is the first step.
At the end of their conversation,
Jo’s mother encouraged her daughter with these powerful words, “I have a better
friend, even than Father, to comfort and sustain me. My child, the troubles and
temptations of your life are beginning and may be many, but you can overcome
and outlive them all if you learn to feel the strength and tenderness of your
Heavenly Father as you do that of your earthly one. The more you love and trust
Him, the nearer you will feel to Him, and the less you will depend on human
power and wisdom. His love and care never tire or change, can never be taken
from you, but may become the source of lifelong peace, happiness, and strength.
Believe this heartily, and go to God with all your little cares, and hopes, and
sins, and sorrows, as freely and confidingly as you come to your mother.” I
believe that on our own we cannot completely control our own feelings; in other
words, we need the Lord’s help if we want to rid ourselves of feelings such as
anger and jealousy. We can change our own actions, but we need the Lord and the
power of His Son Jesus Christ to change our natures. Mormon described to the
faithful of his day what they could do to fill their hearts with love: “Wherefore,
my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye
may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true
followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that
when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that
we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure” (Moroni 7:48).
Only through His help can we overcome vices we face, such as anger, and change
our very hearts to be like Him.
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