Whoso is Found Possessed of It

In his main talk in general conference this past weekend, President Oaks told of an experience that taught him about love. He related how he had an unusual impression to call a certain woman from the audience at a stake conference to speak. He said, “As she came forward, I was apprehensive about what she might say. She introduced herself as a nurse employed to watch over patients in a maximum care facility. Her patients included one she described as ‘the most repulsive man’ she had ever met. (Where was this heading? I asked myself.) From his bedridden position, he did everything he could do to make life miserable for the nurses who were caring for him—including foul language, spitting on the floor, and constantly insulting them in other repulsive ways. She despised him. One evening she heard a loud crash from this man’s room. Responding, she ran to his room and was shocked to find him fallen out of bed and thrashing about in a pool of broken glass, liquid, and blood. In that moment, a profound change came over her. She felt an almost electric current of love from our Heavenly Father to this man. She saw him as a child of God. As she knelt and held him in her arms and tried to give him comfort, he said, ‘I want to go home. I just want to go home.’ In a short time, he was dead. She testified that being brought to see a despised enemy like this as a child of God was one of the great spiritual experiences of her life.” President Oaks remarked, “For me, this was a lesson I needed to learn about our Heavenly Father’s love for all His children.” I can only imagine what it must have felt like for this nurse to try to provide care for a man who was so repulsive and mean to her. But clearly she did provide that care, and because of that the Lord eventually granted her something she could not have developed on her own: a love for that man.

               This story reminds us that love is ultimately a gift from our Father in Heaven. We should strive to act in love, but only the Lord can change our hearts to truly feel love, especially for those who may be very difficult to show any affection for. In his prophetic teachings about charity, Mormon told us first the things that we should do: “And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” To suffer long, to be kind, to not be proudful, to not think evil about others—these are actions we can do to show charity towards others. But, as Mormon emphasized, ultimately to have charity is to receive a gift from God, and so he also invited us to earnestly seek it through prayer: “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ.” The wording of the previous verse is interesting: “But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him” (Moroni 7:45-48). He didn’t say “Whoso did charitable acts” but rather “Whoso is found possessed” of charity—thus what matters most is that we come to receive this gift. I believe that can only come as we first strive to the best of our abilities to do the actions of charity—just as this nurse did as she took care of a difficult old man—and then the Lord will bless our efforts with his gift. And Mormon’s words remind us of one of President Oaks’ most famous teachings: “In contrast to the institutions of the world, which teach us to know something, the gospel of Jesus Christ challenges us to become something…. The Final Judgment is not just an evaluation of a sum total of good and evil acts—what we have done. It is an acknowledgment of the final effect of our acts and thoughts—what we have become.” Ultimately what matters most is that we become someone who is filled with charity. As we “strive to follow the Savior in His teachings about how to relate to one another,” He will help us to develop the kind of love that He has for everyone, even the most repulsive. That is what this nurse learned that day as she cared for one of God’s suffering children and found herself filled with love.