Beauty for Ashes

One of the stories that stuck out to me from general conference this weekend was that told by Sister Anette Dennis in the Sunday morning session. She told of a man named Jack who had a very skilled bird-hunting dog Cassie. The man one day decided to show off the capabilities of the dog to some friends at a hunting club, but when he tried to get Cassie to perform she acted very strangely and would not do anything she normally did. She only wanted to remain by his side and eventually he just took her home amidst the mocking of his friends for her unusual behavior. Jack was angry with the dog and couldn’t understand what was going on. When he finally got home he examined Cassie more closely, and to his horror found that she had a large gash on her chest and another severe injury on her paw. He was ashamed at how he had treated her dog and realized that “her behavior had been influenced by her pain, her suffering, and her wounds. It had nothing to do with a lack of desire to obey Jack or a lack of love for him.” Sister Dennis commented, “How many wounded individuals do we have among us? How often do we judge others based on their outward appearance and actions (or lack of action) when if we fully understood we would instead react with compassion and a desire to help instead of adding to their burdens with our judgment?” This story is a powerful reminder of our need to respond to difficult situations, misbehavior, and unexplainable actions of others with compassion and concern instead of judgment and rebuke. My mission president’s wife liked to use the image of a burr in horse under its saddle—you have to pull off all the layers to get down to the root of an issue. If we only come at things on the surface we will likely never discover the real causes of things. As I have heard it said, “Hurt people hurt people,” and as disciples of the Savior our role is to try, without judgment, to help all who are hurt.

                In another talk this conference, Sister Kristen Yee quoted this powerful scripture about the Savior from Isaiah: “To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified” (Isaiah 61:3). That scripture is first and foremost a commentary about the Savior’s mission and atoning sacrifice. We can also apply it to our own lives, for we should seek to do the same: lift up those who mourn, offer beauty when there are ashes, give joy and praise when there is heaviness. When we find those who are struggling, and even those who are bitter and angry and mistreating others, we can respond with love and kindness knowing that we don’t understand where they are coming from or what has hurt them. The Savior showed us how to do this in a powerful story recounted in Matthew 17:14-21: “And when they were come to the multitude, there came to him a certain man, kneeling down to him, and saying, Lord, have mercy on my son: for he is lunatic, and sore vexed: for ofttimes he falleth into the fire, and oft into the water.” Most of the world today would treat such an individual with disdain, mocking, and judging. But the Savior wasn’t there to judge but to heal: “And Jesus rebuked the devil; and he departed out of him: and the child was cured from that very hour.” He knew the real cause of the strange behavior—the devil inside the man—and so he addressed that with love and the man was cured. In another story there was a man “who had his dwelling among the tombs; and no man could bind him, no, not with chains: Because that he had been often bound with fetters and chains, and the chains had been plucked asunder by him, and the fetters broken in pieces: neither could any man tame him. And always, night and day, he was in the mountains, and in the tombs, crying, and cutting himself with stones.” Again the world would treat such an individual with fear and judgment and anger, not seeking to understand but to condemn. But Jesus showed compassion and addressed the root cause of the strange behavior, casting out the devils in the man so that he was “sitting, and clothed, and in his right mind” (Mark 5:2-15). As disciples of the Savior we must seek to love first and save judgment for later, looking for the hidden wounds that drive people and that we might be able to help heal. Sister Dennis summarized, “I believe the Savior is inviting us to live a higher, holier way — His way of love where all can feel they truly belong and are needed…. We are commanded to love others, not to judge them…. Everyone needs to feel that they really do belong and are needed in the body of Christ.”