Mine Eyes Water My Pillow

Both Nephi and Jacob ended their record in the Book of Mormon with some sadness. Nephi wrote in his final chapter, “But I, Nephi, have written what I have written, and I esteem it as of great worth, and especially unto my people. For I pray continually for them by day, and mine eyes water my pillow by night, because of them; and I cry unto my God in faith, and I know that he will hear my cry.” He hoped that all could be saved, “And I pray the Father in the name of Christ that many of us, if not all, may be saved in his kingdom at that great and last day.” But he seemed to know that this could not be the case: “And now, my beloved brethren, all those who are of the house of Israel, and all ye ends of the earth, I speak unto you as the voice of one crying from the dust: Farewell until that great day shall come. And you that will not partake of the goodness of God, and respect the words of the Jews, and also my words, and the words which shall proceed forth out of the mouth of the Lamb of God, behold, I bid you an everlasting farewell, for these words shall condemn you at the last day.” He then finished with this statement, “For what I seal on earth, shall be brought against you at the judgment bar; for thus hath the Lord commanded me, and I must obey. Amen” (2 Nephi 33:3, 13-15). I think he was saying that he wished the judgment day could be different for those he loved who rejected the things of God, but he knew in the end that it couldn’t be. I have always considered his tears mentioned in verse 3 to be about the Nephites—his children and grandchildren—but perhaps when he said “my people” he included the Lamanites as well. They were certainly part of his family and had been his people. In verse 13 when he addressed “my beloved brethren” which included his actual brothers—Laman and Lemuel—and their people. His nieces and nephews as well as his wife’s brothers and their families were among the Lamanites. Undoubtedly their separation still caused tears on his pillow at night as he longed for them to be reconciled to God.

            Jacob also mourned at the end of his record because of the Lamanites and their rejection of the truth. He wrote with sadness, “And it came to pass that many means were devised to reclaim and restore the Lamanites to the knowledge of the truth; but it all was vain, for they delighted in wars and bloodshed, and they had an eternal hatred against us, their brethren. And they sought by the power of their arms to destroy us continually.” He then gave this somber description of his people, “The time passed away with us, and also our lives passed away like as it were unto us a dream, we being a lonesome and a solemn people, wanderers, cast out from Jerusalem, born in tribulation, in a wilderness, and hated of our brethren, which caused wars and contentions; wherefore, we did mourn out our days” (Jacob 7:24, 26). Laman and Lemuel were also his brothers; and their people were his family just as they were Nephi’s. It appears that their rift, and Jacob’s inability to restore his family to the knowledge of the truth, brought great sadness upon him as he finished his record and mourned out his days. Like Nephi, he sorrowed that his family would not be able to have a pleasing day at the judgment bar.

            Jacob’s yearning for the Lamanites to be brought to a knowledge of the truth clearly was passed on to his son Enos. Enos, the nephew of Laman and Lemuel and whose cousins were among the Lamanites, wrote, “And I bear record that the people of Nephi did seek diligently to restore the Lamanites unto the true faith in God. But our labors were vain; their hatred was fixed, and they were led by their evil nature that they became wild, and ferocious, and a blood-thirsty people, full of idolatry and filthiness; feeding upon beasts of prey; dwelling in tents, and wandering about in the wilderness with a short skin girdle about their loins and their heads shaven; and their skill was in the bow, and in the cimeter, and the ax. And many of them did eat nothing save it was raw meat; and they were continually seeking to destroy us.” He didn’t express the same sadness as his father, but it seems to be implied as he wrote simply, “And I saw wars between the Nephites and Lamanites in the course of my days” (Enos 1:20, 24). Their separation was a great cause of mourning for the righteous who were unable to restore the family bond that had been broken. And that is why the Nephites like Ammon and his brethren were eventually filled with such great joy when some of the posterity of Laman and Lemuel were finally brought to a knowledge of the truth.