The Key to Happiness

As my children start to get a little older, I am realizing that one of my challenges in parenting is to help them find happiness. When they are unhappy as toddlers it is not much of a real concern because the cause of sadness is typically something that is soon forgotten or easily fixed by me. And I don’t worry that it is some deep-rooted struggle but rather a passing moment of frustration. But in my older children their unhappiness sometimes lasts much longer than a toddler’s 10 minute tantrum, and it is much harder for me to provide a solution to their frustration or anger. They naturally turn towards screens and entertainment, thinking it seems that electronics or other gadgets hold the key to their happiness, but of course those are only articles of temporarily enjoyment and don’t do much to really brighten their mood. So how do I help them find real happiness and contentment in their lives as they approach the turbulent teenage years? 

I believe that the simple gospel solutions in King Benjamin’s address and interaction with his people in Mosiah 4 are a key to answering this question. We read that the people “cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men.” They prayed to the Lord for forgiveness of their sins with faith in Jesus Christ, and this was the result: “And it came to pass that after they had spoken these words the Spirit of the Lord came upon them, and they were filled with joy, having received a remission of their sins, and having peace of conscience, because of the exceeding faith which they had in Jesus Christ who should come” (v3-4). It was repentance and faith in Jesus Christ, the first two principles of the gospel, that allowed them to receive forgiveness of their sins which resulted in joy and peace. King Benjamin encouraged them to continue with faith and repentance: “Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in heaven and in earth; believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in heaven and in earth…. And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you” (v9-10). In other words, have faith and sincerely repent. He highlighted again that the “remission of [their] sins” had caused “exceedingly great joy in [their] souls” and encouraged them in these words: “I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily.” He then gave the promised blessing that would come from this faith, repentance, and humility: “And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins” (v11-12). For me this is one of the greatest promises of all scripture—with repentance and humility we can always rejoice.  

So how do we obtain joy? It is through humility and faith in Jesus Christ. And it is through most importantly repentance and receiving a remission of their sins. Perhaps the most important thing that I can do then for my children is to help them ask for forgiveness from their Father in Heaven in prayer so they can indeed feel that peace of conscience which comes from repentance. In our home we generally are good and reminding our children to “say sorry” when they have done something wrong, but perhaps what is even more important than that is for them to ask forgiveness of their Father in Heaven. Only then can they have the Spirit in abundance to help them feel joy like this people of King Benjamin. In commenting about the joy of Ammon, Mormon wrote, “Now was not this exceeding joy? Behold, this is joy which none receiveth save it be the truly penitent and humble seeker of happiness” (Alma 27:18). In other words, humility and penitence—which surely imply repentance—are the key ingredients to receiving “exceeding joy.” If we believe in the gospel of Jesus Christ we must believe that humility, faith, and repentance are the necessary steps to the joy we all seek.