He Shall Know and Bear Record
President Holland once spoke about the loss of the 116 pages of the manuscript of the translation of the Book of Mormon with an interesting insight. Joseph was at his parents’ house waiting for Martin to return with the manuscript. President Holland described what happened in these words, “When Martin Harris does not return, and does not return, and does not return with that manuscript, ‘although [Joseph] was now nearly worn out, sleep fled from his eyes, neither had he any desire for food, for he felt that he had done wrong, and how great his condemnation was he did not know’ (Smith, History, p. 126). When a fellow traveler inquired about Joseph's gloomy appearance and the cause of his affliction, Joseph thanked him for his kindness and mentioned that he had been caring for a sick wife and child, and that the child had died. As a result, his wife was very despondent, but he refrained from giving any further explanation beyond that. When pressed about the situation, Joseph replied as before--that he had left his wife in such precarious health that he feared he should not find her alive when he returned; furthermore, he had buried his first and only child just days ago, but--note this—'there was another trouble lying at his heart, which he dared not to mention’ (Smith, History, p. 127).” Surely it was a terrible ordeal for this young man to lose his first child and nearly lost his wife, but as President Holland highlighted, this experience of losing these pages was, it seems, just as heart-wrenching for him. “Another trouble? Deeper than those? Deeper than a wife who was on the threshold of dying and a son who already had? How deep can such a trouble be? And what could possibly be the nature of it? Well, you and I know the answer to that.”
President
Holland continued the story in these words, “The next morning, eight o'clock
came and went, nine o'clock, ten o'clock, eleven o'clock came and went.
Finally, at half past twelve, Martin is seen walking with a slow and measured
step toward the Smith house, his eyes fixed remorsefully on the ground. Then he
pauses at the gate, drawing his hat down over his eyes. Finally summoning the
courage to enter the house, he takes up his knife and fork to eat a proffered
noon meal with the Smith family but immediately drops his utensils. Hyrum
Smith, observing that, says, ‘Martin, . . . are you sick?’ Upon which Mr.
Harris presses his hands to his head and cries out in a tone of deep anguish, ‘Oh,
I have lost my soul! I have lost my soul!’ Joseph, who had not verbalized his
fears until then, springs from the table, crying 'Martin, have you lost that
manuscript? Have you broken your oath, and brought down condemnation upon my
head as well as your own?' ‘Yes; it is gone,' [replies] Martin, 'and I know not
where.' 'Oh, my God!' [says] Joseph, clinching his hands. 'All is lost! all is
lost! What shall I do? I have sinned--it is I who tempted the wrath of God. I
should have been satisfied with the first answer which I received from the
Lord; for he told me that it was not safe to let the writing go out of my
possession.' He then wept and groaned and walked the floor in anguish.” Lucy
Mack Smith also related in her account, “[Martin] saw all the family in the
same situation of mind as himself; for sobs and groans, and the most bitter
lamentations filled the house. However, Joseph was more distressed than the
rest, as he better understood the consequences of disobedience. And he continued
pacing back and forth, meantime weeping and grieving, until about sunset, when,
by persuasion, he took a little nourishment. The next morning, he set out for
home. We parted with heavy hearts, for it now appeared that all which we had so
fondly anticipated, and which had been the source of so much secret
gratification, had in a moment fled, and fled forever" (Smith, History,
pp. 128-29).
After relating this, President
Holland commented on the experience in these words, “Well, my goodness, that's
an elaborate little side story--which makes absolutely no sense at all unless,
of course, there really were plates, and there really was a translation process
going on, and there really had been a solemn covenant made with the Lord, and
there really was an enemy who did not want that book to ‘come forth in this
generation’ (D&C 10:33). Talk about literary flair and a gift for fiction!
Lucy Mack Smith gets an ‘A,’ right along with her son, if this is all an
imaginary venture, to say nothing of the terrific performances by Mr. and Mrs.
Harris and the entire first generation of the Church.” In other words, the
devastation described in Martin, Joseph, and the whole family certainly doesn’t
make sense if Joseph was making up the record and the book was merely a work of
fiction from someone’s head. No, to Joseph it was everything, and knowing he
had grievously sinned in the sight of God was utterly devasting to him. And for
him and Martin, they would go on the rest of their lives faithful to their
testimony of the Book of Mormon. Martin was true to his witness of the book to
his dying breath, and Joseph spent time in jail shortly before the martyrdom
bearing witness of the Book of Mormon. The only logical explanation to their story
and devotion in their lives is that they believed in the book with all their
hearts.
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