For Thy Good

In the most recent general conference, Sister Tamara W. Runia described a tragedy that struck their family several years ago. She related, “Thirteen years ago our oldest son, Ryan, woke up on a Monday morning, kissed his wife and four young children goodbye, and left for work. A few hours later, he collapsed and died from undetected hypertrophic cardiomyopathy. His heart simply stopped.” She related how she realized this was something that she could not fix and did not understand. She continued, “When I spoke at Ryan’s funeral, I looked at his wife, Cari, and their four children with such a heavy heart and said, ‘I don’t understand why this happened. I don’t. But let me be clear: Not understanding is not the same as not believing.’” She told of a scripture that “has changed the lens through which I view my life. The setting is a jail cell, where Joseph Smith is pleading with God for a reprieve—for a break from his circumstance. Instead, he was told, ‘All these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.’” Sister Runia commented, “God’s answer implies that experience is valuable, and I’m learning the only way to get it is to go through it. Can’t we skip over it? Is there some other way? No, there isn’t another way.” Some experiences simply have to be lived, just as the Savior could not perform the atonement by another other way than going through it in mortality Himself.  

Her words remind me of the popular children’s book by Michael Rosen “We’re Going on a Bear Hunt.” As the family goes on their bear hung together, every time they reach an obstacle they say, “We can’t go over it. We can’t go under it. Oh, no! WE’VE GOT TO GO THROUGH IT!” Those are their remarks when they face the long grass, the cold river, the thick mud, the dark forest, the snowstorm, and the gloomy cave. The refrain reminds us that in life too when we face obstacles or experiences that we wish would just go away, usually we can’t go over them or under them—we must go through them. But the words of the Lord to Joseph Smith remind us that no experience is wasted in the Lord’s hands: even the worst experiences will ultimately be for our good. Sister Runia made this comment on the words of the Lord to the Prophet Joseph Smith in Liberty Jail: “I’ve often wondered if the Prophet had any idea when he received this revelation what these words would mean to so many of us now who are also turning to God, pleading for a break.” Indeed, surely Doctrine and Covenants 121-122 are some of the most quoted passages in all of the scriptures for Latter-day Saints. According to scriptures.byu.edu, these two sections have a total of 1104 references from general conference talks, Journal of Discourses speeches, and writings in the Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith. Joseph Smith’s experience was not only incredibly valuable for himself, but it became a source of comfort and strength and inspiration for millions as they were going through their own Liberty Jail type experiences. That fact is a symbol of the incredible truth that Doctrine and Covenants 122:7 teaches—our trials will ultimately be for our good.

I appreciated this analogy that Sister Runia also gave in her talk: “And while I know earth life is about experience, why am I so surprised every time I experience it? Maybe it’s because I grew up hearing things like ‘If you keep the commandments, you’ll be blessed. Pay your tithing, and the windows of heaven will open. Follow the Word of Wisdom, and you’ll have health and protection.’ True promises, right? So the gospel felt like a big umbrella I could hold over my head to keep the rain from falling on me. But I’ve learned from experience that we’re all going to get rained on. And sometimes we’re going to get pelted! The gospel isn’t the umbrella; it’s the solid rock we’re standing on during the storm—that ‘sure foundation … whereon if men build they cannot fall.’” Indeed, those promises are true, but they do not imply that we will have no struggles or trials or adversity. We are blessed for keeping the commandments, but that blessing may be the strength to overcome as opposed to the elimination of difficulties. Thinking of the gospel as a sure foundation upon which to stand in the storm instead of an umbrella that shields us from the rain can help us to accept and expect adversity “when all [the adversary’s] hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon [us]” (Helaman 5:12). 

Sister Runia summed up her talk with this powerful testimony: “And one day, when all the suffering and loneliness have ended and our pain is gone, we will be able to step back and look into the mirror of our own soul. Then we will ‘stand all amazed’ and feel to fall at the Savior’s feet and thank Him. We will thank Him for all of it—the molding, the shaping, the pain, and the adversity that have helped us become more like Him.”