Two Father-Son Stories

In the Book of Mormon we have stories about two different father-son relationships that have similar struggles but very different endings.  The first is that of Lehi with his sons Laman and Lemuel.  Throughout the story that we have, Lehi earnestly sought to help his two oldest sons choose to follow the Lord.  He pled with Laman, “O that thou mightest be like unto this river, continually running into the fountain of righteousness!” (1 Nephi 2:9) To Lemuel he similarly implored, “O that thou mightiest be like unto this valley, firm and steadfast, and immovable in keeping the commandments of the Lord!” (1 Nephi 2:10).  When Lehi had his vision of the tree of life he said to them, “But behold, Laman and Lemuel, I fear exceedingly because of you.”  After relating the dream Nephi recorded again that “he exceedingly feared for Laman and Lemuel; yea, he feared lest they should be cast off from the presence of the Lord.”  Nephi continued by saying that Lehi “did exhort them then with all the feeling of a tender parent, that they would hearken to his words” (1 Nephi 8:4, 36-37). 

Lehi continued to exhort and teach and plead with his sons that they would keep God’s commandments throughout the story of their journey.  He taught them many things as 1 Nephi 10 records, and on the ship during their rebellion he “said many things unto them” as he tried to convince them to repent and let Nephi go (1 Nephi 18:17).  2 Nephi 1 is devoted to further teachings that he gave to Laman and Lemuel as he “speak many things unto them,” including a reminder of “their rebellions upon the waters” (2 Nephi 1:2).  Again and again and again he pled with his sons to make righteous decisions and to repent, but after all of the miracles they saw they still chose to rebel.  What more could Lehi have down to help his son?  Very little it seems.             

             The story of Alma and his son has some similarities to Laman and Lemuel’s story.  Alma was very rebellious and was a “very wicked and idolatrous man” who sought to wreak havoc for the church even though his father was the prophet.  Though we certainly have less details about Alma the Elder’s feelings and teachings, we know that prayed so much for his son that finally an angel came to Alma the Younger saying, “The Lord hath heard the prayers of his people, and also the prayers of his servant, Alma, who is thy father; for he has prayed with much faith concerning thee that thou mightest be brought to the knowledge of the truth” (Mosiah 27:14).  Alma was wracked and tormented with his sis and ultimately repented and became an incredible force for good among the Nephites as he taught the gospel. 

So what was the difference to cause Alma to repent but Laman and Lemuel to continually reject their father?  Surely Lehi and Alma were both incredibly righteous.  On the one hand the story of Alma gives us great hope that the prayers of parents can have an incredible impact on their children, but on the other hand knowing that even a prophet could have wayward children who reject the gospel is a little discouraging.   In both cases the Lord even sent angels to help the wayward youth, and yet still Laman and Lemuel rejected the gospel.   Perhaps this difference helps us to see and understand that (1) we can make a big difference in the lives of our children, but (2) ultimately they must learn on their own to use their agency as God intends.  We give everything we can into teaching and raising our children, and then like so much else we leave it in the hands of the Lord of the harvest.